Korede

The Rubbish Booty caller

Some rubbish booty caller tried a fast one on my sister.A few years ago, my friend said her brother was looking to settle down and could I introduce a nice girl to him. One of my sisters, Fumzi was single then and doing her MBA here. So, I thought why not? My friend is a lovely woman and I have known her from secondary school days and even know the brother in question. So, I thought it was a lovely idea. I asked my sister if it was ok and she said it was so, I gave my friend my sister’s number to give her brother. Brother called Fumzi and they spoke on the phone. They were both in the UK as foreign students, both doing MBAs so, it seemed like a great match. They spoke a couple of times and arranged to go and watch a movie on a certain week. The bobo was schooling in London while my sister schooled in England.

Can you imagine my sister’s confusion and astonishment when the next day, the boy called my sister to tell her that he was on his way to visiting her and was getting on the train? My sister reminded him that the date was not for that weekend, that it was for the weekend. He said he knew, but he kinda missed my sister and wanted to see her. Miss bii ti bo’o? Miss like how? You have not even met me before and we only spoke a couple of times na. The guy said my sister should never mind that, that he had a good feeling about my sister. This was around 9.30pm. My sister assured him that coming to see her in East England, all the way from London was not a good idea and that she would not open the door for him, that it was a better idea that he waited till the following weekend. She asked him how he would get back to London that night as the journey was at least a 2 hour journey. He told my sister that he could kip at hers. My sister warned him once again not to come. Then put her phone on silent and went to bed.

She woke up the next morning to see about 50 missed calls and text messages from the guy. Apparently, he thought my sister was joking. SMH… My sister Fumzi? Lol. That girl is as craaaay as they come. The guy actually got to her station around midnight and was calling my sister to get my sister’s address. My sister is cray. Had I been moi, moi would have been curious to know if he turned back, would have been worried about his safety sef. But Fumzi no send persin.

jem

That was the last time I tried to matchmake her when she ja mi ni warning after that. Previously I had introduced her to a very good friend of mine, a very very spirikoko brother and it seemed like a good match. They went on a date and my sister came back to ja mi ni warning. That brother spirikoko was telling her that he liked k’ink_y s’e_x… tie up, bondage, and all sorts of sherenren. Ah toh.

sunkanmi-kd

I remember another time I tried to matchmake her to a friend of mine who was a divorcee then. The guy had a fantastic job, came from old money, was intelligent, good looking and witty. And I thought it was a good match. But the guy apparently thought that he was G’od’s gift to women. He was rude and condescending to her. Anyway, thankfully, she is now married with a kid. No thanks to me.

This Post Has 16 Comments

  1. Every attempt to matchmake me has been a disaster. Most guys are looking for where to display their excesses. From rude to sexual deviances, God’s gift and the one in a committed relationship/ about to wed. You captured them all. Let’s just say their friends are usually more shocked than i at these revelations. Ise alarena ko easy mehn.

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